We’re coming off the Thanksgiving holiday here in the US, which for many is a time of being grateful. Gathering with family and friends spotlights the important relationships in our lives and makes us thankful for what we have.
For others, the holidays can be one of the most difficult times of the year. Maybe there are some particularly difficult family dynamics, or the time of year brings to mind the loss of a loved one.
Even if you more closely identify with that second group, finding the positive can make a big difference in your emotional state and the overall quality of your life.
The Power of Gratitude
Dr. Robert Emmons, professor of Psychology at UC Davis, is considered by many to be the world’s leading expert on gratitude. In his book Thanks, he says that practicing gratitude can make you up to 25% happier.
But that’s just the beginning of the physical and emotional benefits that come with gratitude, which include:
- Reduced stress
- Lower blood pressure
- Better sleep
- Reduced risk of depression
Practicing gratitude can even slow down the body’s natural aging process!
The craziest part? The specifics of your situation don’t actually matter.
Gratitude is an internal perspective change that simply chooses to notice the positive things. You don’t have to deny that negative circumstances exist. You just choose to reframe your situation and focus on the positive.
A Personal Story of Gratitude
About a year and a half ago, my dad was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer in both lungs.
It came as a complete shock to the entire family. He had always been very healthy and went in simply because he had a nagging cough that never seemed to get better.
Fortunately, the treatment is going very well. But it still rocked our world pretty hard.
About 2-3 months before his diagnosis, we started meeting regularly for coffee. I came to the realization prior to his diagnosis that my time with him was limited, and I wanted to make the most of it.
No agenda. No business. Just spending time with my dad.
He’s told me some crazy stories during those meetings. Like how he once hitchhiked across the country to be at the NCAA Men’s basketball tournament when the university decided last-minute they wouldn’t cover his travel.
When I heard the news about his cancer, at first, I admittedly got pretty emotional.
But then I felt incredibly grateful that we had started meeting for coffee before I got the news.
There are a couple of things we can take away from this story:
- Don’t wait until someone is gone from your life to appreciate them
- Things are never all good or all bad like we tend to think
From one perspective, a cancer diagnosis is often viewed as a death sentence. But the truth is we’re all going to die someday (memento mori).
If you can come to grips with that fact, you can make the most of each moment you have.
If my dad were the one writing this newsletter, he’d tell you his diagnosis was a blessing in a lot of ways, as it's caused him to be grateful now for every single day he’s been given.
Adopting an attitude of gratitude is how to make sure you truly live.
The Bottom Line: Find the Silver Lining
When we worry or get upset about the negative things in our lives, it simply steals the joy from everyday moments.
But if we can find something to be grateful for, we can find happiness just about anywhere.
That doesn’t mean we don’t want things to be different. It just means we’re going to make the most of what we have.
Would I prefer my dad not have lung cancer? Absolutely! But it doesn’t change the fact that I have limited time left with him. And by choosing to be grateful for the time that I have, I can make each moment count.
What are you grateful for?
